Why do they think I care?

So I sent an email to a friend.

Dear XXXX,
We are planning a dinner out with Y,Z and T. Are you guys available on Saturday August 14?

rgds
Daniel

What I expected back was either

Dear Daniel
Love to come. Count us in.
Rgds
XXXX

or
Dear Daniel
Sorry we can't make it. Maybe next time.
Rgds
XXXX

or responses along similar lines...However what I received was this.

Dear Daniel
Thanks for the invitation.
On August 14 Bob has his selection trial for the Wallabies in the afternoon and we are not sure what time the trials end. Amazing for a 15 year old but we always knew he was a gifted athlete...Really it is amazing to have a son who is both brilliant and a gifted athlete. Did we mention that in the Year 9 NAPLAN tests he was in the top band for everything and he was recently voted the "most gifted" in the Gifted and Talented programme at his school.

Clearly those early intervention classes we instigated when he was 3 have paid off. That and have an amazing gene pool to start with.!!

Also Mary has the lead in the school dance festival at the Opera House in September which of course leads to selection trials for the Australian Ballet or a role on Home and Away and August 14 is the first rehearsal and so again it might be tight. We are quite stressed at whether to let her pursue her love (and obvious talent) with dance and her love (and obvious talent) with drama while undertaking 24 units for the HSC ( I just feel 10 units is too limiting for such a child) or we get her to focus on one activity. Her LA baed acting agent believes we should skip school and have her at castings tomorrow but her London based Ballet agent is convinced that the Royal Ballet is her destiny. How she will cram all this in along with her role in the Youth United Nations Summit in Beijing next month is anyone's guess.

Little Quentin is attending the "maths for fucking geniuses" workshop in the city also the morning of August 14 and normally he needs some quiet time in the sensory tent at home when he gets back. I just do not understand why they won;t allow him to undertake advanced pure maths..Just because he is a tad young (at 4) should not limit his opportunities. Of course he is still terrribly jetlagged from his recent trip to the World Chess Championships in Moscow. He was inconsolable with his second place finish in the open competition but we reminded him that disappointment is part of life...Not that such a gifted child will have much more disappointment in his life!

Finally my darling Stefan (the husband) is competing in the olympic trials on the Sunday afternoon - we are so amazed that he got in given he i2 52 and has had 2 hip replacements - I guess he is just one of those gifted athletes. Having dinner the night bfore may disrupt his pre-race preparation...It's so fortunate that he completed his double PhD in record time and still had time to write the definitive work on the development of democracy all within the 6 month sabatical from his role as Professor, Smarted Guy in the Room Dept at the London School of Economics...I guess some peopel can just rise to the challenge.

So as you can imagine with all that on and the fact that I need to undertake Australia's first multiple organ transplant and mood alteration surgery in the morning it would be hard to make it to dinner on the 14th.
Thanks again for the invitation..Oh...and how is your family...you have 2 children or 3?and someone died recently?.your mother/father/sister... I can't quite remember.

Rgds

Beatrice

Why do people feel the need to list their achievements and those of their children at every opportunity? Why do they think I would care? Of course I hope that all children enjoy fulfilling and happy lives and I wish the same for all adults...I just don't need to know every bowel movement undertaken by every child within a 100km radius..

Perhaps just maybe, yet again, the insecurities of the adults are playing out. They feel that they must prove beyond any shadow of doubt that their child is special and therefore so are they. Special and BETTER.

Another friend told me the other day about their recent holiday to NY. Great!. Did you all have a good time? We had a wonderful time....Especially little jonathon. He was desparate to go to MOMA (Museum of Modern Art but always referred to as MoMA) as he is so artistic...Geezzz. Give me a break...Little jonathon is 8. Just how gifted can he be and even if he is gifted at art why did you feel the necessity to tell me?...Ahhhh...... to make sure I understand that Jonathon is special and better and therefore you are special and better.

Just to be clear.

I don't think the possession of any skill, success in any particular profession, level of intellect or wealth, selection to any sporting team or macrame group makes you a better person than anyone else.

The only truly better people in our society are those who live their lives in humble service of those around us, while maintaining humility with regard to their achievements and those of their family. They genuinely understand that life is a lottery and for whatever reason they, or their children, are enjoying success and for this they are be HUMBLY grateful as their lives will be easier. They are thankful that their child does not have a life threatening illness nor a lifelong, debilitating condition that will make for a tougher journey.

So in summary dear friend next time I ask you over for dinner just say you can't make it ...please